Sunrise
by soniagiris
Summary: Haru has a problem. A relationship problem. And for unbeknownst reason she decides to talk about it with Yusuke.


"I suppose I have always been selfish," Haru says in consideration, resting her chin on her arms folded on the coffee table. "Perhaps the reason is my upbringing, Father's absence mixed with a lavish lifestyle giving birth to my deplorable yearning for any sort of love and affection..." She pauses, then looks up. "Does that make any sense to you?"

A heavy silence follows. After a few beats of it, Haru repeats, "Does it?"

"What does?" Yusuke looks up from the set of nail polish bottles they've been arranging. They furrow their brow, then, as the proverbial light bulb goes off, wince and give Haru an apologetic smile. "Oh, I seem not to have paid you enough attention… My apologies."

Grinning a bit, Haru shakes her head and lifts herself up to peer at her friend's work. The color composition, as usual, is unconventional—bold orange and modest pink giving the impression of a summer sunset — ah, indeed, it truly will feel quite pleasant to wear such thought of that causes her to brighten — but her traitorous mind wastes little time with reminding her of previous dilemmas. She sighs and sits back down, taking her eyes off Yusuke's curious expression and instead focusing on their quick, skilled fingers which do not stop fidgeting.

"A few days ago — well, in point of fact, during our meeting at Leblanc," she begins, keeping each word slow and thought-out, "I've finally realized the true nature of those feelings that, as you know, have been troubling me for a fairly long time."

"Mm…" Yusuke hums a little as they unscrew one of the assorted tiny bottles. "I'm glad to hear that you are no longer perturbed by this lack of insight. Could I have your hand?"

As she offers it to them and watches them take it and start painting her nails, Haru recollects herself until she's ready to carry on.

"This may sound infantile and hopelessly cheesy, but the realization came to me when Ann-chan demanded that she, Mako-chan and I take a photo together." She inhales through her nose, then declares, "Yu-chan, I have a crush on both of them."

"Oh." Yusuke tilts their head, takes a quick peek at her from underneath their lashes. "That's good. Lucky them."

"Unlucky me," she adds with a wry little smirk.

"Why?"

At first, Haru has the urge to answer in a sarcastic, self-loathing tone, the one she uses for uncooperative suppliers, as the tiniest spark of frustration passes through her. But, after all, that's what it does — passes. And she knows too well to speak at once. She purses her lips to hide a tender smile. Yusuke's occasional ineptitude in social interactions, while thankfully getting rarer and rarer, did prompt her to think in more depth about why.

Why did the thought of liking both Makoto and Ann make her so fretful?

"One of the reasons for my worries is that, in a case that all of three of us dated, only for something to go wrong, three hearts would be broken, and three relationships would be soured."

"You're assuming that something would go wrong," Yusuke points out without raising their head, "whilst it is perfectly acceptable to expect such arrangement to bring joy to all of you."

"Yes, yes, you're correct, but, then again, I don't know if Mako-chan and Ann-chan would be alright with sharing me…"

"They would, for dating you must be amazing."

Haru laughs briefly. Sometimes she wishes that she wasn't a lesbian and Yusuke wasn't interested in men only, so the two of them could get together and perhaps conquer the world. But having them as her best friend and confidant was enough of an honor.

"You're awful," she says. "Okay, moving on. They could also not believe in the validity of my feelings; from what I've gathered, polyamorous people do have it hard when not dating their kind."

"Haru, you're too smart to presume this much," Yusuke chides her gently as they move to her other palm. "Who knows, maybe they are one of, as you put it, your kind."

"Both of them at once? I would be incredibly lucky." Yet she thinks it may be probable. Ann has already come out to their group as a lesbian, prompting Makoto to confess she's pansexual a few weeks later. Then, three months after that, Futaba said she's not interested in anything with anyone, and, during a party, Ryuji was found making out with Mishima-kun in Leblanc's restroom. Not to even mention blatantly bi Akira, nor Yusuke, who came off gay to anyone who talked with them for more than five minutes and didn't surprise anyone when proclaiming that, quote unquote, they do not believe in gender nor want to be referred to with gendered pronouns.

As Mona put it — put two gay people in a group of eight, give it a year and you'll end up with no one being hetero anymore.

"You deserve such luck," Yusuke says, bringing her back to Earth from her pondering. They catch her eye and give her their trademark little smile. "You deserve to be loved."

"So do you," she says instinctively. "And… I want to be loved by both of them at once." She sighs and, when Yusuke lets go of her, rests her hands on the table. "So selfish."

"No, I don't think so." They pluck out a polish for themself — matte black, very classy — and set it aside. "Love is a beautiful thing which ought to be shared and spread. You having such feelings for two people instead of one means, at least to me, that your heart is of great shape." Another tiny grin. Haru wishes her nails were dry so she could reach out and take her friend's hand between hers. Instead she leans forward and bumps their foreheads together, drawing out a surprised laugh out of Yusuke.

"You're a tad too wise," she says. "It's making me feel silly."

"My apologies," they say, not very convincingly. "But perhaps you truly should shake off these doubts and take the chance to be happier than you are as of now. You do deserve it, after all."

"Thank you." She nods. "I— I think I'll follow your advice."

"Not my advice. Follow your heart."

When she laughs at such a cliche expression, they squint at her in confusion — which causes her to only laugh even harder.


End file.
